Bid on the infamous mobile Lazy Boy here.
The dude that got pulled over on his mobile chair was stripped of his most prized possession. Now you can have it!
http://tenenbaumfail.tumblr.com/
Picking on Sammi for being Margot last year.
Hmm, I always thought it was the brontosaurus.
5:30 a.m.
Mat decided to open with one of his famous monologues, albeit an abbreviated version.
The first joke was about Halloween! How topical!
Mat said he’s planning to dress as the Continental Airline pilots that forgot to land. Yeah, he’s just going to sit in room and play on his laptop and forget to go to the party. Hi ho.
His second joke actually garnered a laugh from the gang, probably because it was in poor taste. He said the Today Show dressed up for Halloween this morning and that, based on their behavior, they’re dressed as retarded people.
Our friend Danny from Yelp asked Mat to be the Sub Zero to his Scorpian. He was really excited that someone thought about him when making plans, and couldn’t wait to tell Carlos, Sammi, and Preston about his costume.
Mat found out that Danny had asked both Preston and Carlos, as well as a short list of other 91X employees, to be Sub Zero before he was asked.
Mat’s ego refused to let him move on without knowing how many people were asked before him.
The rest of the gang delighted in this.
6 a.m.
Mat replayed the “Morrissey” interview prank that Carlos, Sammi, and Preston played on him yesterday. If you STILL missed it, listen to it below! It is funny. Promise.
Pop Trash: Four teens arrested in Utah for rapping their McDonald’s order.
Kid blames Jack Daniels steak at Applebees for a .07 BAC.
(This leads to Sammi telling everyone that you can drink in a bar in Wisconsin when you’re 13 or 14 as long as you’re with your parents. No one believed her until someone from Appleton called in to confirm.)
Jimmy Kimmel puts Melissa Joan Hart, back in 1996.
DRUNK DIAL LINE
Included:
The guy ended up saving that Butterfinger for the next morning; Donut finds the cops at his house; Preston’s Dad has a couch for him; tip from a stoner: stay away from Jurassic Park; Busy B is livin’ the dream; fresh burgers right to your door; Good Time Cookie Monster lost a Hot Pocket in his car; and stoney Star Wars.
7 a.m.
What’s on the Internet?
Bid on the infamous mobile Lazy Boy here.
and
http://tenenbaumfail.tumblr.com/
and
Mat and Sammi tried, awkwardly, to stall while Carlos hunted down Shaun Phillips (to no avail).
8 a.m.
Today Mat’s jokes took on Preston’s life in the “Comedy/Tragedy” category of the “Scariest Thing in the World” bracket.
It was head-to-head the whole time, but ultimately Preston’s life was considered the most horrific.
Sammi even converted a few voters after explaining how uncomfortable it is to have Mat lock eyes with you and tell you a joke. She physically doesn’t know what to do or say. It is traumatizing. Plus, her life isn’t really any better than Preston’s.
Preston voted for his life.
Mat’s jokes will live on and it’s YOUR FAULT.
More Pop Trash:
MARIO THE MEXICAN MORRISSEY FAN’S DOUCHEBAGS OF THE WEEK
Honorable Mentions: Andre Agassi, The Quaid’s, the Northwest pilots.
The Douchebag of the Week: Carlos and Preston, for yesterday’s Morrissey stunt.
MORE DRUNK DIAL LINE
Added:
Zabrocki is hung over; and space bears now have AIDS.
9 a.m.
THE BOTTOM 40
When Mat Diablo uses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…
The Bottom 40.
Today’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:
Can’t Stop Partying – Weezer (feat. Lil’ Wayne)
Consider yourselves informed.
-SS
Standard Podcast: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download Drunk Dial: Play Now | Play in Popup | Downloadhttp://douchebagsinnorthpark.com/
You’ve seen them… now they’re archived!
http://theyahooanswers.tumblr.com/
Socrates would be proud.
5:30 a.m.
Mat wanted to kick off the show with an anecdote about Dave Grohl and how awesome he is. Well, two anecdotes about Dave Grohl and how awesome he is.
Number 1: Once the Foo Fighters were playing in Reno so Mat’s brother and his friends/bandmates hid in a loading dock all night so they could meet him.
Sure enough, Grohl walked in and they popped out to say hi. They told him how they slept there to meet him, and handed him their band’s demo. Dave Grohl had been given a dressing room apart from the Foo Fighters, so he gave it to Mat’s brother and friends to party in while he joined his own band in the other room. Later when they were walking by the Foo room, they heard their demo blasting.
What a cool guy.
Number 2: once Mat’s engineer friend-of-a-friend was working with the Grohl in studio on something. Josh Homme was there, the whole shabang. Grohl was having a pool put in at his home in Virginia, and he was on the phone with one of the people responsible for construction of said pool.
He was answering questions and just said, “Alright, alright, how much is all that going to cost? Cool, do it.”
When he hung up, he lifted a fancy American Express card in the air and walked it through the room humming “Smells Like Teen Spirit.”
What a cool guy.
6 a.m.
BARGUMENT
Mat’s iPhone app “Barguments” is an instant conversation starter.
A Bargument is a debate with no wrong or right answer that must be uncomplicated enough to discuss after three beers.
The discussion: is it always trashy to have a name tattooed on you?
Mat asked because he is considering tattooing his daughter’s name on his collar bone. The majority of listeners said that it is perfectly OK when it’s a child’s name, or a friend who has passed.
The most notable story came from Dangerous Dave. While Dave was in prison, he got a letter from his pregnant girlfriend that said she had twin boys.
He had his cellmate tattoo their names on him, only to get out and find out he was not the father.
Mat was horrified.
Pop Trash:
Stripper claims hussy’s finger.
(This story reminded Carlos and Sammi of a house party they attended once where the stripper pole was ripped from the ceiling. Good times.)
Canadian singer killed by coyotes.
Kid will kill and eat cat if Miley doesn’t tweet.
Levi Johnston shows his johnson.
Pete Wentz loses bet, has portrait of fellow douche tattooed on him.
ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 13TH GRADER?
Aurelio, a recent SDSU grad, took on Carlos, our resident 13th grader, in a battle of intellect.
Somehow, Carlos pulled it out and won. His record is something like 4-27. Or 5-27, now.
Aurelio was awarded tickets to the 91X Halloween Boo’s Cruise and IA: MMA fight in Balboa Park anyway. He just has to buy Carlos and Sammi a drink.
The questions:
What is the most common element in the Earth’s atmosphere?
Which ocean goes to the deepest depths?
Which bear grows to a larger size: grizzly? Or polar?
What does HTML stand for?
What date comes 22 days after June 19?
What is the northeastern most state in the US?
Who served as the last president of the Soviet Union?
What band took their name from guitarist Eddie and drummer Alex’s last name?
What is the name for the one-eyed giants in Greek mythology?
In which country is the Taj Mahal?
7 a.m.
What’s on the Internet?
http://douchebagsinnorthpark.com/
and
http://theyahooanswers.tumblr.com/
Today getting pregnant/impregnating someone defeated seeing your parents have sex in the “Things that will certainly ruin your day” category of the “Scariest Thing in the World” bracket.
8 a.m.
BEER FOR BREAKFAST
Lauren Young from Lagunitas came in before San Diego Beer Week with some fantastic beer that got us (me) all very drunk. So pardon this recap if it takes a turn for the nonsensical.
The first beer we sipped was the classic session beer: Lagunitas IPA. You know it well. A classic 5 and a half percent alcohol with the taste of hops on the front and carmel malts on the back.
The second beer we tasted was Brown Shugga’, a 9.87 percent “mistake gone right.”
It was supposed to be Lagunitas’ barley wine, but it wasn’t fermenting correctly. So, the powers that were bought every box of brown sugar from the surrounding neighborhood that they could and dumped it in.
The yeast did its job and pumped out some alcohol, and here it is. You can try it for yourself at BevMo or Whole Foods (and I highly recommend that you do try it).
Sammi said it tastes like the best flavor of Pop Tarts (brown sugar and cinnamon, of course).
Tonight: help yourself to $2 12 oz. Lagunitas IPA’s at Gaslamp Tavern!
Tomorrow: Lagunitas Pint Night at Toronado! Keep the glass with IPA, Brown Shugga’, Hop Stoopid, Lil’ Sumpin’ Extra and Lil’ Sumpin’ Sumpin’ on tap.
Also check out Lagunitas during San Diego Beer Week.
More Pop Trash:
It’s National Oatmeal Day!
Sammi’s response: “You know what tastes good in oatmeal? Brown Shugga’!”
Mat read the story about the girl killing and eating her cat if Miley does not rejoin Twitter.
Sammi’s response: “You know what tastes good on a dead cat? Brown Shugga’!”
There is no man that Mat looks up to more than Morrissey. Carlos, Preston and Sammi told him they interviewed the man.
If you missed it, listen below. There is nothing I can say about it if you didn’t hear Preston’s God awful Morrissey impression. Enjoy!
9 a.m.
THE BOTTOM 40
When Mat Diablo uses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…
The Bottom 40.
Today’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:
Swim to Reach the End – Surfer Blood
Consider yourselves informed.
-SS
Standard Podcast: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download Beer For Breakfast: Play Now | Play in Popup | DownloadToday Harry O took on Clowns in the “Things that will kill you” category of the “Scariest Thing in the World” bracket.
There was an overwhelming response from paranoid people who claim clowns can be anybody under all that makeup… one could even be Harry O.
For some reason everyone kept swearing so we had to cut the voting short, but there was a clear winner: clowns. The deadliest of children’s entertainment figures.
Remix your favorite songs by adding everyone’s favorite piece of percussion!
I think they mean the muffins are hot…
Today the gang will make McNuggetini’s.
Stay tuned, and watch them live at 91xmorningshow.com.
The “old man” robber has struck again. (The way I wrote that makes it sound like a robber is stealing old men, but I assure you it means a robber who is of an elderly age.)
There is now a picture at the NBC San Diego site, and he looks like the face of pure evil incarnate.
Actually, he kind of looks like when people make oranges into faces. Like this.
6 a.m.
Mat read the menu behind a “This is Why You’re Fat” Twitter contest among popular street food trucks in New York. They will be selling:
The Cheesy Mac n Rib Melt, Fried Chicken Skin, Deep-fried Twinkie on a Stick Dipped in Chocolate Syrup, the Fat Koko, the Fat Elvis, the Spamsicle, French-fry Encased Hot Dog on a Stick, the Brick of Cheese, the Pizza Cone, and Hot Beef Sundae.
Pop Trash:
Lillith Fair is back, hear it roar.
Hulk Hogan joins TNA wrestling.
Natalie Portman knows you rape animals.
MIXOLOGY 101…kind of
Mat made McNuggetini’s for everyone.
They consist of a chocolate milkshake (we used Frosty’s from Wendy’s), vanila vodka, chicken nugs, and bbq sauce.
Line the rim of a martini glass with barbecue sauce. Then mix the vanilla vodka (four shots) and milkshake in a shaker. Shake! Pour into glass, and garnish with a chicken nugget.
7 a.m.
What’s on the Internet?
and
BRACKET
Today Harry O took on Clowns in the “Things that will kill you” category of the “Scariest Thing in the World” bracket.
There was an overwhelming response from paranoid people who claim clowns can be anybody under all that makeup… one could even be Harry O.
For some reason everyone kept swearing so we had to cut the voting short, but there was a clear winner: clowns. The deadliest of children’s entertainment figures.
8 a.m.
SPECIAL GUEST
Maynard James Keenan called in before he ventures out here for back-to-back shows on Halloween and November 1 at Spreckel’s.
Puscifer has a new EP “C is for (Insert Sophomoric Genitalia Reference Here)” that is incredible. It includes the song “The Mission” featuring Mila Jojovich. Rumors of their live show precede them, and Mat asked Keenan why it’s being referred to as a “cabaret.”
He said that, honestly, it’s because they didn’t know what else to call it. He compared it to the Sonny and Cher variety show back in the day.
Mat wondered if it was a coincidence that he should be playing here on Halloween, or if it was intentional.
Keenan said he had nothing to do with it. Apparently it was written in the Old Testament that San Diego would need a savior on Halloween night, and if Alice Cooper could not be summoned, it would have to be Maynard James Keenan.
Keenan is a man content with the life he has created (duh, why wouldn’t he be? coolest guy ever), and doesn’t see the need to leave Arizona much since he is self-sustainable. He does like to travel every so often to spread the rock and the roll.
The interview was plagued (in a good way) by Keenan’s usual passe tone. He must find joy in knowing that interviewing him scares the shit out of Mat, because for some reason no matter how miserable he sounds during the interview he always calls and asks to come back on the show.
What a cool guy.
Go see Puscifer! And listen to 91X to win Meet and Greet passes. Because Maynard almost NEVER agrees to meet and greet. But he wants to meet you, San Diego.
More Pop Trash:
Sarah Palin makes a shit ton of money.
Free Blackjack tacos after dark on Halloween.
ANOTHER SPECIAL GUEST
Junior Quisquis from the Palomar Mountain area joined us for a “World Record Wednesday” spot as he attempts to enter the Guinness Book of World Records.
He wants to defeat the current record of jumping a souped up golf cart 40 ft. set by the Nitro Circus guys by almost doubling the distance.
The only thing he didn’t realize was that it is effing expensive to be considered for Guinness. Not only were there fees galore, but he found out he has to fly out the representative on business class if he wants them to witness his jump. He has spent well over $5200 so far. Hopefully it’s not for nothin’!
Go support Junior on Halloween night at Amago MX! Watch the jump! Watch history happen!
9 a.m.
THE BOTTOM 40
When Mat Diablouses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…
The Bottom 40.
Today’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:
The Mission – Puscifer
Consider yourselves informed.
Plus I spent all morning making this. Enjoy! Love, Sammi.
“We’re the three best friends that anybody could have.”
-SS
Today the Los Angeles Chargers took on being sodomized by a bear in the “Would You Rather” category of the “Scariest Thing in the World” bracket.
The Chargers moving to Los Angeles proved more horrific than being dominated by our frightening, furry friends of the forest.
Tomorrow Harry O takes on clowns.
The ol’ Switcheroo.
Literally the only people still on Myspace. They forgot about immature midlife narcissists, though.
Busted.
5:30 a.m.
Jagger and Kristi have quarantined themselves from the rest of the station because they don’t want their horses to get Swine Flu.
They have this right because, as Mat put it, their show is a solid A+ while we squeak by with a low C-.
6 a.m.
The government declared Mat’s monologue jokes Weapons of Mass Sadness.
But he did it anyway…
MAT’S MONOLOGUE
Today Mat announced that his monologue was aviation themed.
Preston responded, “Well I let’s see if we can get this thing off the ground.” Hi ho.
The jokes centered around the pilots who overshot their Minnesota landing by 150 miles.
He said that they can no longer play Guitar Hero 5 in the cock pit.
Then he said that Hilary Swank’s new movie Amelia is receiving less than stellar reviews because of its historical inaccuracies. Apparently at the end of the flick she overshoots Minnesota by 150 miles.
Sammi said it would have been funnier if he said the historical inaccuracy was that Amelia Earhart didn’t have a penis. Hi ho.
Better luck next time, Matty.
Pop Trash: Sex is not an issue for Rosie O’Donnell.
Steve Phillips’ lover dude was also fired.
Griese suspended for ‘taco’ comment.
Andy Samberg is dating the Sammi of indie rock.
THE MORE YOU KNOW WITH HARRY O
Harry O., a sales guy at 91X, knows everything.
If you want to know about a motocross event that happened in San Diego in 1974, he’s your guy!
If you want to shoot stuff, he’ll take ya!
But most of all, if you want to hear a story, he’s got a million.
Preston catches them on tape. Mat plays them on air.
This week’s story was about Harry O’s experience with prank wars.
He and his buddies from Manhattan and Hermosa would be cruising up and down the coast in their trucks. When they had to piss, they did so into zip lock bags. When they had to shit, it was into Doritos bags.
Then they would “huck” the bags of piss and ”McGiblets” onto the windshield of the other car, and battle this way throughout the trip. Sometimes it would leak through the windshield and onto the dashboard. “That’s how we used to prank ourselves.” Harry O said you don’t know a prank until you’ve gotten hit in the face with a McGiblet. July 1979, where were you?
The more you know.
7 a.m.
What’s on the Internet?
and
and
BRACKET
Today the Los Angeles Chargers took on being sodomized by a bear in the “Would You Rather” category of the “Scariest Thing in the World” bracket.
The Chargers moving to Los Angeles proved more horrific than being dominated by our frightening, furry friends of the forest.
Tomorrow Harry O takes on clowns.
8 a.m.
One of our favorite pieces of audio is the hillbilly who received a DUI on his lawnmower after his wife threatened to stab him in the face if he didn’t get her another beer.
Recently there has been an influx of DUI’s on interesting vehicles.
One man, Dennis Lee Leroy Anderson, received a DUI for operating his motorized Lazy Boy with a BAC of .29. He crashed it into a parked car.
Kyle Wygle once engineered a motorized bar stool by combining a bar stool with a riding lawnmower. After about 15 beers, he tipped it over and received a DUI.
Dave Grohl got one in New Zealand on a 2-stroke moped.
A 58-year-old man, William David, got one for riding a tricycle home from a bar after promising the police he wouldn’t.
David Alan Rogers commandeered the float he was driving for a Christmas parade and led police on a three mile chase before he was served a DUI. The dancers and performers aboard began jumping off when they realized they were on a renegade float.
Melissa York went for a midnight horseback ride. and ran the horse into a police car.
A few drunk Russian soldiers comandeered a tank that they ran into 3 houses while under the influence.
And the winner: two drunk dudes in England tried to hitch a ride home from a bar on Dave the dolphin, a bottlenose dolphin that lives in the English Channel.
SPECIAL GUEST
Michelle Vera, MMA fighter and sister of UFC fighter Brandon Vera, came on the show to talk about her fight on Friday.
She had to be a fighter, it’s in her genes. Not to mention she spends all her time at the family owned Alliance Training Center.
Turns out her opponent for Friday’s fight had dropped out for unknown reasons, so they are looking for a new one. She said it doesn’t matter who, when it’s go time she has to be ready.
She’s been training hard enough that it doesn’t really matter who she goes up against. To prove it, she arm wrestled Sammi and, of course, kicked her ass.
Meanwhile her brother is getting ready for his first title fight vs. Randy Cotour at UFC 105.
See Michelle kick someone’s ass at the International Alliance MMA Brawl in the Bowl at Starlight Bowl in Balboa Park this Friday! There will be drinks a plenty.
Check out www.ia-mma.com for more details, and get $15 off your ticket at 91x.com!
9 a.m.
THE BOTTOM 40
When Mat Diablouses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…
The Bottom 40.
Today’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:
Hell – Tegan & Sara
Consider yourselves informed.
“We’re the three best friends that anybody could have.”
-SS
Standard Podcast: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download Michelle Vera: Play Now | Play in Popup | Downloadabby from a galaxy far far away are you smarter than a 13th grader? awesome balls Barack Obama Beer beer for breakfast bottom 40 carlos Chargers DEPreston diddy drunk Drunk Dial Line Dubya East County Election fatty Gary Busey gayness get your yelp on hit by a car jackass John McCain LOLZ Mat Diablo MMA obama old people Padres Politics preston Ruggy sam the cooking guy snuggies Stay classy steve west UFC useful Video Videos Vlog What's on the Internet world record wednesdays yelp
