2 Beds 1 Girl
5:30 a.m.
Mat walked into the studio while Asher Roth’s “I Love College” was blaring from the speakers. He knew what he had to do.
If an early morning rap battle is what Roth wanted, he sure as hell came to the right place.
Mat played Carlos’ “I love Junior College” as a rebuttal.
And it was on.
There’s a new show about fat people finding love that everyone is really excited to make jokes about.
Brenson called in from the eye of a Gas Tank Rodeo hurricane.
Godspeed, lil’ buddy.
6 a.m.
Mat reaired the interview with Jim Gaffigan from last week in honor of his Comedy Central special “King Baby” that debuted Sunday night.
What’s on the Internet?
http://thisiswhyyourpetisfat.blogspot.com/
and
http://whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com/
and
http://www.peoplewhositinthedisabilityseatswhenimstandingonmycrutches.com/
THE 91X MORNING SHOW 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY
Join us Friday morning at the 7 10 Beach Club in PB for a FREE party honoring our first year on the air!
Can you believe it!?
Performances by Asher Roth and Iglu & Hartley will provide the soundtrack for a day of drunken celebration.
7 a.m.
ABBY FROM A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY
Grandma Abby, Carlos’ grandmother, called in to aid 91X listeners with love and sex advice.
She is single-handedly in charge of the esteemed Art Center of the senior home in Carlsbad.
Recently a legal US citizen, Abby is wise beyond her years in all facets of life from her years of extraordinary experience.
She is a poet, a writer, a lover, and even had her own radio show back in the day.
By request, the segment was dubbed “Abby from a galaxy far far away.” (Well, Colombia.)
Doug had a question for her. He asked her how to tell his girlfriend one of her dogs died while he was dog-sitting. He was contemplating switching out the dead dog with a new, more alive one.
She said the idea is good for him, but what about his girlfriend?
She asked what he would do if he brought the new dog to her and it bit his girlfriend.
So, he must tell her the dog died, and then present her with beautiful, new, live dog.
It was beautiful advice from a beautiful woman.
She then told a joke about elderly prostitutes.
Punchline: “They are having a yard sale.”
Listen in for next time we check in with our Colombian sweetheart.
Pop Trash: San Diego Comic Con 4-day passes already sold out, Michael Jordan spotted at True North, Bill O’Reilly boycotts Sean Penn films, Josh Hartnett hospitalized, ‘Bruno’ gets an NC-17 rating, and ‘More to Love’ finds love for fatties.
Happy birthday, Christopher Walken.
8 a.m.
As you have probably heard by now, Sammi’s man friend has bunk beds. In a breakfast nook. With no doors.
Now, she associates bunk beds with sexual innovation.
An Ikea catalog is her porn mag.
So she wrote a rap song about her experience with bunk beds. Listen below.
Enjoy.
SPECIAL GUEST!
Manny Puig came in to talk about his new show Savage Wild on the Outdoor Channel.
Puig prefers predators like sharks and gators to the more polite porpoises and playful turtles.
He believes his work brings the civilized world closer to the wildness.
Puig wears camouflage on a daily basis. Just throwing that out there.
The Jackass boys originally found him while he was levitating alligators underwater in a speedo.
Savage Wild premieres Saturday at 2 p.m. on the Outdoor Channel.
The first episode features a 2000 lb. Monster Gator.
Carlos asked Mat to use his skills of gauging gators’ age on Mat.
He guessed somewhere in his 30s. Haaaaa.
He also offered San Diego some advice about the whale in the bay, “If the whale dies just wait until the sharks come and eat it.”
9 a.m.
THE BOTTOM 40!
When Mat Diablo uses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…
The Bottom 40
News: U2 skips San Diego, Smashing Pumpkins has open auditions for drummers, Smashing Pumpkins and Tool Lollapalooza rumors, Buddyhead Gossip Page is back, and Lil’ Wayne’s rock album put back again.
This week’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:
Walking on a Dream – Empire of the Sun
Consider yourselves informed.
Carlos thought that Canada was in the UK.
More Pop Trash: Ohio man receives DUI on a motorized bar stool.
Today we learned that the chicken came before the bitch.
Carlos thanked Mat for being an idiot.
Preston thanked Manny Puig.
Sammi thanked corn dog flowers that the fatties will be receiving.
-SS
Standard Podcast: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download
Manny Puig: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download
Bottom 40: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download
Sammi's Bunk Bed Rap: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download
