91X Morning Show with Mat Diablo

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For our very first WORLD RECORD WEDNESDAY, Carlos broke this record:

See for yourself!

Sammi found the picture of Mendes in Elle and thought it was Carlos. Mat can’t look at either Eva or Carlos the same way again. See if you can differentiate between the two!

 

Genius! right?

Wrong. Its not working out for me. Everyone is struggling financially and could use some extra cash, why not get paid for doing something you already do?

I live in Solana Beach and commute down to Fashion Valley everyday, thats 35 miles round trip. All my money seems like it goes just to get to work. Plenty of ppl are looking for new resources to make some green. I’ve thought of soliciting myself on casual encounters where I would charge 100 roses for an hr message but the po-po are starting to crack down. None seem feasible with out having to flat-out get another job! Except, I have thought of 2 options…

Get paid to drive! I drive about 600-800 miles a month and wanted to ‘Nascar’ out my car. I would sell my fender, my bumber and my hood to local company’s to advertise on them. I’m desperate enough to not care what was said or the image use to sell their product. Genius, but not original.

My other option seems like a get rich quick scam… I want to donate my seed, my DNA, my mojo, my man-hood! If i can get paid for doing something so easy (and quick), I’d be foolish to pass up the option. I do it anyway, might as well get paid for it. There should be a line at the clinic that wraps around the building twice over…every guy in town should be lining up.

I tried donating once but I was rejected (maybe cuz i showed up a little drunk), my question…do i keep trying? I was only thinking short term, MONEY!!!, but i didn’t realize my seed could really be used. Im a care free kind of a guy but having my ‘Children’ all over SD is a little too much. hmmm…

5:30 a.m.

There has not been one day this week that the entire morning show has been on time.

Carlos was late for the second time this week and was not answering his phone. As punishment, Mat Diablo gave his cell phone number out on air. All of a sudden Sammi the Intern didn’t feel so bad about the Steely Dan Alarm Clock as it is not nearly as bad as the Compulsive Listener Constant Alarm Clock.

 

6 a.m.

When Carlos finally arrived he had 54 wake-up calls and an infinite amount of text messages. He certainly got Diablo’d.

Drunk Dial Line!

The Coalition to Bring Back Drunken Fatty called, then drunken Fatty miraculously returned.

Requests for sweet, sweet sax and 80s pop.

Someone who had been antiqued by Carlos called to promise revenge.

Fatty, in bed with a schmoggle.

Imaginaaaaaaaatioooooon.

A drunk chick from Vegas.

A PSA to warn the masses of the Beer Pong Herpes Outbreak.

 

 What’s on the Internet? http://totallyradshow.com/

 

 7 a.m.

At 7:10, Junior Seau was the first professional athlete to get Diablo’d after a zinger from Carlos.

 

Moose, handicapper to the stars, called in his picks for today’s races!

6th Race

1st: Little Boss Chick

2nd: Morning Frost

3rd: Unusually Hot

Moose said to put a dollar down on an exact-a-bet.

7th Race

1st: Lang Field

2nd: Dark Islander

3rd: All Man

Moose also said to bet against Awesome Jim, and play the three horses in an exact-a-box .

8th Race

1st: Lord Albion

2nd: Jamie

3rd: Smuggling Ado

“The name’s Moose, not Moses, so don’t listen to a word I say.”

 

“I can’t afford to live in a van, gas is too expensive.”

 

Carlos was already wearing a tie in preparation for the Mandate. So when he announced that he didn’t own one, Mat was confused. Carlos explained that he had to borrow one from Sammi.

Then it came out that Mahoney has his dad tie all of his ties, and keeps them knotted so he can just slip them on and off.

 

Pop Trash: Bale begs for privacy, Jolie and Pitt used IVF, Brooke doesn’t know sh*t, MTV doin’ the Time Warp again, CGI pubes, and Dustin Diamond writes about the bell.

A.C. Slater’s penis has dimples.

 

8 a.m.

Mahoney uncharacteristically made a high-minded reference at 8:12.

 

Ruggy came in to help you Get Your Yelp On during Comic Con weekend!

Where to get your “no dress code” on:

Basic: Connecticut style pizza, no cover, dogs allowed!

Fleetwood: Very chill, very good food, and two DJ rooms!

La Puerta: Mexican food until 1 a.m., free appetizer if you’re wearing a costume, and 100 types of tequila!

 

Where to get your event on:

Comic Con downtown

4 O’ Clock Fridays with Super Diamond

Cash’d Out @ The Ramona Theater

Bare Essentials Grand Opening @ UTC

The Aquabats @ HOB

Burlesque Show @ Brick by Brick

The Shining (midnight movie) @ The Ken Theater

Shark Attack & others for Jeepers (Comic Con after-party) @ 4th and B

Annual Record Show in Hillcrest

STP, Wolfmother, and Black Rebel Motorcycle Club @ Qualcomm Concerts on the Green

Coheed and Cambria @ Viejas

 

Everyone has that one great story; the one you tell time after time at parties and dinners, that is so ridiculous and unbelievable there is no way it could have been made up.

Today’s winner of sold-out Comic Con tickets was Angela who sent in this amazing tale:

A group of my girlfriends made plans to go to the “Thunder from Down Under” show in Vegas several years ago. Unfortunately, I was unable to attend the show but I was able to get all of the details.

The girls were sitting in the front row and throughout the show, several dancers entered the crowd and danced with various women. One dancer came up to one of my girlfriends and proceeded to gyrate in her face, wearing only a thong might I add. The evening was a blast and a great time was had by all.

However, about two days later my girlfriend noticed one of her eyes was red and swollen and proceeded to get worse. Upon seeing her doctor she was advised that her eye was infected because of a foreign object. That foreign object was a crab that apparently had been flung into her eye by the gyrating dancer.

I don’t know if there is a moral to this story other than maybe you should wear goggles when attending a male stripper show in Vegas.

 

There you have it, folks! A week’s worth of Comic-Con-worthy tales culminated with this installment of

the Greatest Story Ever Told.

 

 

9 a.m.

 

Alex, Dan, and Jeff from the Totally Rad Show came into the studio to talk about their plans for Comic Con this weekend.

Unfortunately, they forgot all the free swag they had to give away this evening and had to send Steve (the manservant) back to homebase to retrieve it.

 

“Steve is the glue that holds the show together.”

 

For the uninitiated, TRS is a jack-of-all-trades discussion-type show; the guys review and discuss movies, TV shows, video games and comics. Jeff described it as, “The View for dudes with awesome stuff.”

 

Essentially they just drink beer and talk about pop culture. (Hey, that’s what we do!)

 

Their excitement for the pan-Geek extravaganza was apparent in their demeanor and tone. Then Jeff and Mahoney talked about The Shield for five minutes.

 

Mat admitted that, unlike Mahoney, he was never into comic books growing up, but has recently gotten into the ever-popular “hipster underground graphic novel.”

 

 

The TRS guys could not agree with Mat in his love for The Chronicles of Riddick, but they were very polite about it.

“I like that you liked it.”

 

 

Check them out TODAY for a live edition of their show at Comic Con!

 

Carlos thanked the Imagination song guy.

 

Sammi thanked whoever named their horse Unusually Hot because she’s really rooting for him.

Mahoney thanked all the listeners that woke Carlos’ ass up and got him here this morning.

Mat thanked A.C. Slater’s Penis and its dimples.

 

 

-SS

Hi. This is Mat Diablo. I am posting this for Carlos because he HATES this shit. He is really angry at American Apparel. Czech it:

courtesy of catbird.

I was in no shape to show up to work the way I was feeling today. It felt like when I was sleeping, some snuck into my house and punched me right in the face and then dropped the people’s elbow across my chest. Can you smell what I’m cooking? I can’t believe I incorporated the Rock into my blog (It’s been a long day).

I usually take a nap right when I get home, for at least an hour to recharge. Yesterday I didn’t. A few friends had called during the show wanting to go surfing, of course I said yes. We went out for at least 2 and a half hours. The water is so warm and the air is so hot that you could stay out there, with out a wet suit, for hours. After a nice sesh (cha bra!!) we split. Instead of eating lunch I chose to surf, I went directly home because I was starving.

I made myself dinner, sat down in front on the TV and watched SportsCenter with a nice cold beverage. You can’t beat that. Watching SportsCenter with a beer, God bless the USA. I notice myself getting tired, but waking up so damn early on a daily, I always feel tired.

Before I knew it, it was 415am, the next day!!! I had falling asleep with half a plate of food next to me and my, then cold, beer still upright in between my legs. I’m usually at work by 430am. I live at least 20 min away (do the math). I was still in my sea crusted board shorts and smelling like crap. Thank god my body clock woke me up, other wise I would’ve slept through the show. Waking up with a half a plate of day old food means one thing when I’m running late, breakfast. Everyone’s done it. Eating day old food isn’t really that bad…besides I justified in my head because I was late.

I showed up to work today haggard and smelling like a Steve West’s balls. I didn’t shower, I practically didn’t change and I was late, but at least I ate…That’s why I love radio.