91X Morning Show with Mat Diablo

5:30 a.m.

Carlos’s sister is turning 18 on Thursday.

Carlos got her a Snuggie, then requested one for himself.

Mat and Mahoney decided to give her a Wobbly H.

Then an Erik Estrada haircut.

Then a Snuggie.

Carlos then demanded that he receive gifts in honor of his sister’s birthday.

6 a.m.

Saturday Carlos ditched Preston and Mahoney to go to a sex party.

He went to a soiree at State that had everything– white boy reggae, 4 kegs, a bouncehouse, and a room packed with people having sex.

He walked in to that room 4 times after accidentally discovering it.

At any given time there was an average of 10 people using the room.

Mat and Mahoney wondered if they were just old, or if this was normal of State parties.

Sammi said it’s not really her scene as 1 in 8 kids at SDSU has an STD, but has had friends all leave one party to hook up. Even then, it is very rare.

A couple of callers said that it is absolutely normal to have a roomful of sex, but their philosophies and morals were a little questionable.

Can you imagine cleaning that room afterwards?

All in all, Carlos Montoya is a filthy human being.

What’s on the Internet?

http://dailyotter.tumblr.com/

and

http://peoplewhodeserveit.com/

7 a.m.

Mahoney and Carlos like to make Mat feel guilty about growing up and becoming a family man.

This is a big year for him as his first child is on its way and his 30th birthday is fast approaching. He asked if there was anything he should be doing before he devotes his life to his child and it is too late.

Mahoney thinks he needs to travel more, but Mat has been abroad.

Calls included some great suggestions– jump over some sharks on waterskiis, try acid, hunt a deer with a knife, skydive without a parachute, live in the wild for one month– but nothing that he could not do because of the baby or his age.

The two items added to his “bucket list” were sleep as much as possible, and get really fucked up while he still has minimal responsibility.

Pop Trash: Larry King’s son wants to be black, Obama speechwriter’s girlfriend Maxim model, Megan Fox as Lara Croft, Ugly Betty replaced, hottest lips, and flight simulator cancelled.

8 a.m.

WHITE TRASH COOKING WITH SAM THE COOKING GUY

Sam came in for some more hot plate, microwave oven, good ol’ fashioned home-cookin’!

(Or, in this case, good ol’ fashioned studio-cookin’.)

Today he taught everyone how to make the Pizza Eggs (click for the recipe!)

Essentially it is a leftover pizza omelette.

Mat, throughout Sam’s segment, read the list of the worst foods possible that people consume.

The worst dessert is Baskin Robin’s large Chocolate Oreo Shake, the worst breakfast is the Stacked ‘n Stuffed Banana Pecan Stuffed Hotcakes, and the worst Mexican entree is the Buffalo Chicken Fajitas (with the works) from Chili’s.

Carlos said he had evidence of eating all of the above from his game of Drunken Receipt Rodeo this weekend.

Sam came in with a plastic bag full of leftover pizza, eggs, and butter because, “Leftover is not a four letter word.”

Basically he just cut the pizza into cubes, and fried two beaten eggs over it.

Carlos tried to get Sam excited about pizza-flavored Pringles, but instead Sam ranted about how you can only comfortably fit them in your mouth one way.

His second book will be complete on Frida, so keep an eye out in stores soon!

Included: A Pastrami Man Pocket.

Check out each of Sam’s visits on the Video page of the 91X Morning Show website.

MMA RODEO

David and Aaron went head to head to see who could name the most MMA fighters in 30 seconds.

They both talked a lot of trash, but in the end it was Aaron with a total of 16.

David had only 11, which was extremely disappointing considering Sammi named 6 in 10 seconds.

Aaron received a UFC Prize Pack including a free viewing of this weekend’s UFC 94, UFC 87 on DVD, and tons of UFC gear!

Aaron invited David over to watch it as a gesture of his humility. It was touching.

9 a.m.

THE BOTTOM 40!

When Mat Diablo uses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…

The Bottom 40

News: Still awaiting Coachella news! But the confirmed artists rock. Stay tuned to 91X for breaking news.

A fan passed away at a Slipknot show, Wesley Snipes to play James Brown in a biopic, Ben Folds puts out his own cover album, Radiohead plays the Grammys, all of Obama’s staffers celebrated with a party with Arcade Fire, and The Soft Pack (local boys formally known as The Muslims) gets signed to a record label.

Carlos called Mat out for neglecting to report the new releases today, and then took over the entire segment. It was a rare display of raw power and assertiveness. It was hot.

New Releases: Franz Ferdinand!

In a completely random act of selflessness and chivalry Mat let Sammi pick the song for the Bottom 40 this week!

And so, in an epic installment, this week’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:

Help I’m Alive – Metric

Consider yourselves informed.

More Pop Trash: AnnaLynne McCord rides a bull, Donny Osmond dances with some stars, and Kanye West announces new name.

WHAT DID YOU LEARN TODAY?

Its good to be Colombian, Carlos is racist against Canadians, Mahoney is gay for watching 90210, and you can pick up a demo tape of Mat’s old band at Music Trader.

Carlos thanked the question, “Is Hilary Swank hot?” (No.)

Preston thanked Mat for bathing in his hepatitis bathtub.

Mahoney thanked whoever cleaned up the sex room.

Hollaback, marijuana.

-SS

 

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 Sam The Cooking Guy [14:08m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

 

 The Bottom 40 [19:58m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

5:30 a.m.

OPENING REMARKS

A Carolina Panthers fan needed to vent about the lack of leadership and decision-making in the franchise. Although unexpected, Mat welcomed the call as the jilted fan contemplated conversion to a San Diego Super Chargers fan.

Another caller requested that Mat do his infamous Braylon Edwards impression.

This lead into a critique (and impression) of the product’s newest endorser–some NASCAR guy.

6 a.m.

Mat referred to Detroit as a “frozen tundra with gunshots.”

Carlos has yet another hair-brain scheme to make some extra cash.

To recap: He commutes from his mother’s house (where he resides) in Solana Beach to Kearny Mesa on a daily basis. He tried to “Nascar out” his ride, move to TJ, entice a sugar momma, donate his seed, offer $100 for anyone to take nude photos of him, and panhandled.

All resulted in failure.

Now, in the sad and uncomfortable wake of his parents’ divorce, he is taking advantage of the very people that granted him his privileged life.

Their divorce is in the awkward “dividing up furniture” phase.

So, while they argue and discuss, he is taking the furniture piece by piece and selling it on Craigslist.

Mat and Mahoney told him how terrible he is, but callers disagreed.

They all said that they would do the exact same thing if the opportunity arose. They thought he was making the best out of an unfortunate situation.

But really he is just robbing his parents blind.

What’s on the Internet?

http://disgustingmakeouts.tumblr.com/

and

http://fuckyeahryangosling.tumblr.com/

“What’s this right here?”

“That’s my penis.“

(That’s Sammi’s new pick-up line.)

7 a.m.

Mat’s friend was recently cheated on. His reaction to the unfortunate news was to drive around crying all night before setting up a Christmas tree on her lawn. Underneath were several Christmas presents, all containing mix cds.

Mat decided to let his emo little friend know that he is in good company. Almost everyone has made some embarrassing gesture in the name of love after suffering an intense breakup.

Mahoney had quite a few to share, the most endearing (read: pathetic) being:

Once, while on the phone with his (then recent) ex, he cried so hard that he hyperventilated and passed out in his car on the side of the road.

Alicia took Shel Silverstein’s “The Missing Piece,” put it through a paper shredder, and put it on her ex-lover’s stoop.

Mat asked why it had ended. (He was married.)

Another caller sand a passionate (and public) rendition of The Cure’s “Lovesong” to his ex a few weeks after they broke up. She cried, but they were tears of something other than love as they never rekindled their flame.

One jilted lover had a basketful of teddy bears that his ex had made for him (by hand) during the tenure of their relationship. Naturally, he hand made a bunch of tiny nooses for each bear and hung them on the telephone line outside of her house.

Mat, being the narcissistic ass he allegedly is (according to Carlos), heard his ex (and future wife) was moving away. He taped a mix tape to her door with only one song:

Ok I Believe You But My Tommy Gun Don’t” by Brand New.

What did we learn? Mat’s into himself, and Mahoney’s into other people.

Pop Trash: Megan Fox thinks she looks like a tranny, and Howie Mandel hospitalized.

8 a.m.

Preston got new pants.

WHITE TRASH COOKING WITH SAM THE COOKING GUY

Sam came in for some more hot plate, microwave oven, good ol’ fashioned home-cookin’!

(Or, in this case, good ol’ fashioned studio-cookin’.)

Today he taught everyone how to make the world’s best dessert waffle (click for the recipe!)

Last time we encountered Sam we were drooling over his Emmy’s at his house for our holiday live broadcast!

Sam referred to that day very eloquently as, “Fun as shit.”

He is in the midst of writing his new book, due to his publishers by Thurday.

“I’ve got a lot of book to write.”

It will not only be “recipe recipes,” but will also have chapters detailing what to do if you just have one can of some cheap food product.

Mat complimented Sam’s ability to add those few, random, extra ingredients and competing textures to traditional dishes that give a comepletely unexpected burst of flavors in every bite.

The waffle: “That is stupid good.”

Sam said he brought a gift for everybody but he was really just cleaning out his garage

Keep an eye out for his new book!

Spoiler: It will include a chapter entitled, “I love gravy.”

Check out each of Sam’s visits on the Video page of the 91X Morning Show website.

MMA Fighter? Or Gay Porn Star?

Rico “Suave” Rodriguez… MMA Fighter!

Jeff “The Snowman” Monson… MMA Fighter!

Jens “Turboslut” Hammer… Gay Porn Star!

Mark Andre “Da Bomb” Courtillier… Gay Porn Star!

Joe “El Dirte” Derkson… MMA Fighter!

The caller that differentiated between the two won tickets to the WEC fight at the San Diego Sports Arena on January 25!

9 a.m.

THE BOTTOM 40!

When Mat Diablo uses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…

The Bottom 40

News: The Airborne Toxic Event, The Bug, Hold Steady, Fleet Foxes, Crystal Castles, The Killers, Los Campesinos, Presets (and many, MANY more!) to rock Coachella.

Rumored artists: Animal Collective, Black Keys, Black Lips, Blur, Britney Spears, The Comedians of Comedy, Gaslight Anthem, Outkast, The Replacements, Morrissey, Prodigy, The Pretenders, Turbonegro, White Stripes, and The Smiths.

New Releases: Gorillaz and U2.

Mat wanted to play new Morrissey. Sammi wanted to play new Metric.

It was a battle of the idols as Sammi loves Emily Haines equally as much as (if not more than) Mat loves Morrissey.

It was intense. Sammi won the popular vote, but Mat, a cruel and merciless dictator, prevailed when he vetoed her humble request at the last minute.

So, this week’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:

I’m Throwing My Arms Around Paris – Morrissey

Consider yourselves informed.

WHAT DID YOU LEARN TODAY?

Lessons: Mahoney chewing is a more pleasant sound than Morrissey, MMA Guys have gay names, Preston now has an astonishing 2 pairs of pants in his wardrobe, Oildale is terrible, and Morrissey would not even be tolerable made of gold kugerands served on Kim Kardashian’s supple bottom.

Hollaback, marijuana.

-SS

 

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 Standard Podcast [21:21m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

 

 Sam The Cooking Guy! [13:24m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

 

 The Bottom 40 and Awful Morrissey [19:17m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

5:30 a.m.

Dream Date with Depreston Part Deux is now available for your viewing pleasure.

Mat could not help but make a few quips about Mahoney’s sweatshirt.

It was the periwinkle blue sweatshirt of a 45 year old woman with 10 cats who makes household decorations out of twigs and homemade potpourri.

On it: a snowman with a fuzzy scarf, the sparkly text explaining, “I Love Snow,” and a giant, glittery heart.

Mat, Mahoney and Carlos discussed the massive wang on Fox.

Mat explained that, although he didn’t mean to be so vulgar so early in the morning, he had to give credit where credit was due. (And Extreme Wang is always a case where credit is due.)

While speculating what could have happened that allowed the wang to make it through the filter onto the airwaves, Mat assumed that it actually powered through the camera and into the production studio where it knocked the operator unconscious.

 6 a.m.

Mat found a bunch of extra Third Eye Blind tickets lying around, so he decided to try to pawn them off to you, the listener, as a “party pack.”

The game:

Third Eye Blind Lyric? Or Mahoney’s Facebook Status?

“Can I look at faces that I meet…” Third Eye Blind!

“I just want you. Right here, right now. I don’t care if you’re scared…” Mahoney!

“The rise and fall of my sloppy love. The splatterings and the smatterings; they’ll get you…” Third Eye Blind!

“It’s raining. I’m lonely. I wonder if KFC is still open…”  Preston! (Trick question.)

The caller that could successfully differentiate between the two won the esteemed party pack.

What’s on the Internet? http://betamaxmas.com/

7 a.m.

91X has partnered with the High Dive and the San Diego Food Bank for the 12 Days of Xmas Auction.

Check out the prize packs and place your bids HERE!

Among the goodies is our final show before the holiday season LIVE from Sam the Cooking Guy’s house!

Seats at the star-studded send-off to the Christmas season can soon be yours! Bid now!

Tomorrow from 6-8 p.m. join the 91X Morning Show for an Anti-Raiders Chargers rally complete with a raffle and Raiders pinata!

You can win fabulous prizes including the grand prize: tickets and a limo ride to the Chargers game this Thursday against the Raiders.

All proceeds of the 12 Days of Xmas will be directly donated to the San Diego Food Bank.

91X’s Christmas Show: WREX THE HALLS!

Friday December 12 at 4th & B

Gaslight Anthem!

Alkaline Trio!

Slightly Stoopid!

Cold War Kids!

Cake!

Tickets available TODAY at 10 a.m.

($35 general admission, $40 balcony, 21+)

Don’t miss it.

Mat gave away two tickets to Tommy from OB. Tommy will also be dining with the bands before the show. He hopes to sit next to Slightly Stoopid, as they never sit down to a meal without some greens. Hi ho.

Pop Trash: Jay Leno to do a spinoff of his own show, Oprah weighs 200 lbs., Emma Watson would do nude scenes for a role, Ryan Seacrest and Tara Connor, 9-year-old author lands movie deal, and Anne Hathaway auctions off a drunken date.

In the spirit of the end of the year reflection, nostalgia, recaps and countdowns, Mat Diablo debuted his own segment that will feature a new Top 5 List each day until the new year. He calls it,

MAT DIABLO’S TOP 5!

Today’s list: Top Five “-berto’s” Taco Shops in San Diego.

(according to Matberto)

(Disclaimer: Roberto’s is the O.G. -berto’s, and since sunch respect is due it does not appear on the list.)

5. Rigoberto’s: best California burrito.

4. Rolberto’s: closest to Mat’s house.

3. Gualberto’s 4: chili relleno burrito.

2. Juanberto’s: Strikers 1945 Arcade machine.

1. Adalberto’s: the Texas burrito.

A caller said that there used to be a taco shop named Analberto’s until they trimmed the “l” into an “i.”

8 a.m.

Tomas, a frequenter of Analberto’s and a big fan of Carne Asadomy, called in to scold Mat for not including his burrito on today’s Top 5 list.

WHITE TRASH COOKING WITH SAM THE COOKING GUY 

Sam came in for some more hot plate, microwave oven, good ol’ fashioned home-cookin’!

(Or, in this case, good ol’ fashioned studio-cookin’.)

Today he taught Mahoney how to make Red Beer (click for the recipe!)

Red Beer is a light, crisp relative of a Bloody Mary, but it is made with Newcastle and Clamato juice.

Sam failed to text Carlos back with a list of ingredients again last night, and, again, tequila was to blame.

An email inquired as to what to do with these meager ingredients (ground beef, Tostitos cheese dip, Cup O Noodles, and a piece of bread) to make a somewhat respectable meal.

Amazingly, Sam suggested he cook the beef, mostly cook the noodles, dump all liquids, mix noodles in with beef, toast bread, put noodles and beef on bread, and cook and drizzle cheese on top. Not bad for an off-the-cuff, out-of-the-cupboard response.

He also dropped his first, “That’s what she said.”

Other than a book signing this Thursday at an Appliance Alley, Sam wasn’t sure what he’s up to. Check his website: thecookingguy.com.

Mat made sure to note that the cougar quotient at these book signings is off the charts.

And don’t forget to bid on tickets to the 91X Morning Show LIVE broadcast from Sam’s house next Thursday for our star-studded Christmas Send-off Show.

Check out each of Sam’s visits on the Video page of the 91X Morning Show website.

Shawn Styles called in to explain the situation surrounding the deadly jet crash yesterday. grandmother, mother, child. one still missing.

He reported that the pilot did make a valiant attempt to maneuver the plane into the canyon away from houses and highways, but unfortunately it crashed into a house.

Three people were killed– a grandmother, a mother, and a child– while the body of another child remains missing.

It was a valiant effort nonetheless. And the first question that the pilot, who ejected safely, asked was, “Did I get it in the canyon?”

Mat thanked Styles and the rest of the CBS 8 News Team for being on the scene so quickly.

THE BOTTOM 40!

When Mat Diablo uses the little power he has to plummet past the pop on top and reach into the depths of the musical charts to dig some gems gleaming with promise and potential out from…

The Bottom 40

 News: Motorhead tour cancelled, Fall Out Boy album leaked, Nine Inch Nails to release new record through the Internet soon, and BLUR reunites!

New Releases: Black Lips vinyl and “Bomb” by Busta Rhymes.

This week’s featured tune from Mat’s personal musical piggy bank:

Coffee and TV – BLUR

Consider yourselves informed.

 More Pop Trash: Violent outbreaks at Chuck E. Cheese, Wee Man sued by two chicks he arrested, Jimmy Fallon does dry runs, “The Dark Knight” comes out on video today, and Hoff autographs at universalposter.com.

Carlos thanked KFC.

Sammi thanked Sam for his first, “That’s what she said.”

Mahoney thanked Visanthe for making him feel like less of a man.

Mat thanked Analberto’s.

-SS

 

 Standard Podcast [60:14m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Sam the Cooking Guy is an AWESOME dude, both on and off air, he’s funny, he hate’s Preston as much as we do and he loves to have a good time…he’s just ugly. So to save the our broadcast from a bunch of grumpy guys who like to drink beer…we arragned Miss California to join us LIVE from Sam the Cooking Guy house! You can continue to bid on Miss California…and Sam, at www.91x.com. Oh and remember…its for a good cause, the San Diego Food Bank.