91X Morning Show with Mat Diablo

5:30 a.m.

Mat replayed Sammi’s rap about bunk beds (”Funk Beds”) in case you missed it yesterday!

You can also find it at the bottom of yesterday’s recap.

Carlos got pulled over during the show meeting last night for talking on his cell phone while driving.

But he got out of it after casually mentioning he was on his way to Media Day at Petco Park.

That’s right, he dropped the 91X card.

So Mat invited everyone listening to do the same so that it won’t work for anybody after awhile.

Mat made fun of the terrible flames on Preston’s truck so Sammi made fun of the terrible flames on Mat’s arm.

Inevitably, the conversation turned to Bub Rub.

(woo woooooo.)

The first installment of Out of Work Wednesdays brought Mario the Mexican Morrissey Fan out of TJ and into the studio! He is the official co-host for today!

6 a.m.

The 91X Morning Show: Fueled by Adderall and Mexican Pastries

Mario gave Mat advice about having a baby. He warned him not to watch the birth from the doctor’s POV.

DRUNK DIAL LINE!

Included:

Busy B. checkin’ in with his crunchy Lakeside gumbo and deli meats; Mat Diablo has a purdy voice; Captain Morgan dedicates “Love Hurts” to Mat; Marijuana is always legal in that guy’s house; bunk bed invitations for Sammi; somebody told me, that you had a bunk bed; Ken Choppa wants a frisbee or a key chain from that game indicating how smart you are; moustache rides; and Boy George called Diablo and wants his nose ring back.

What’s on the Internet?

April Fool’s: Google’s CADIE, The Guardian is now Twitter Only, and upside down Youtube all day.

http://www.missrodeolakeside.com/

and

http://www.morrissey-solo.com/

and

http://www.life.com/

THE 91X MORNING SHOW 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY

Join us Friday morning at the 7 10 Beach Club in PB for a FREE party honoring our first year on the air!

Can you believe it!?

Performances by Asher Roth and Iglu & Hartley will provide the soundtrack for a day of drunken celebration.

 Celebrity Guests Confirmed Thus Far: Sam the Cooking Guy, Ahmed Ahmed, The Pad Squad, and many more!

7 a.m.

 Brad, the 91X Morning Show’s first caller EVER, called back in to say Happy Birthday.

WORLD RECORD WEDNESDAYS

So, first Carlos broke the world record for most pictures of fish sandwiches viewed in one minute.

His assistant held and flipped a stack of stills of various fish sandwiches while Carlos yelled the word “FISH” every time he saw one. The old record, 25, was surpassed and more than doubled at 62 by THE Carlos Montoya.

Then Mat broke the world record for number of David Lee Roth “Panama kicks” done in one minute with 93 kicks. It was quite a feat.

He wore Preston’s karate pants and a shirt that Sammi “David-Lee-Roth-ed out” for him.

Mat set the record for most Waldos found in a Where’s Waldo book in one minute at 4!

Preston ate six cupcakes in two minutes and four seconds CRUSHING the original record of six in 11 minutes. He then reset it at seven cupcakes in two minutes and 45 seconds.

Simultaneously, Mat fit a record 16 pieces of Hubba Bubba in his mouth.

They were both drooling messes.

Sammi attempted (and failed) to break the record for most compliments given in 60 seconds. She blamed it on the fact that he had a roomful of strangers while she was stuck with four people she barely likes. (Just kidding.)

Mat then set the record for most backhanded compliments in a minute at 7.

But no one wanted to congratulate him as they were all upset by his remarks.

Sammi subsequently redeemed herself and broke the record LIVE at the World Record Live Broadcast.

Also broken there: Carlos reclaimed his fish sandwich record, most giraffe tattoos on one shoulder, longest “shhhhhhhhhh,” most binder clips attached to a face, fastest beer shotgun, and many more!

Mat broke the world record for most cards in a deck guessed incorrectly in a row in a minute with 25!

Sammi failed again, tying the record for number of donut holes shoved into donuts in 15 seconds.

Last week, Mat failed miserably at attempting to beat the record for naming a rock band for each letter of the alphabet as quickly as possible.

Then Carlos and Sammi went head to head to see who could do the worm the most times in a minute. Carlos got 26, and Sammi matched that within the first 40 seconds WITH boobs and a belly button ring. She did one more in the last 20 seconds just to ensure her victory.

 Today DJ Edgartronic ANNIHILATED the Rock Band record by naming a band for each letter of the alphabet in 20 SECONDS beating the current record of 53.

Then Carlos did 131 karate chops with accompanying sounds in 30 seconds.

Break your own records at http://urdb.org/!

And keep an eye out for footage of all our marvelous feats on the VIDEO page of the 91X Morning Show website.

Tune in next week as the 91X Morning show takes on the world, one record at a time.

Pop Trash: Ashton Kutcher hires Gary Busey (April Fools?), Warner Bros. acquires the Pirate Bay (April Fools?), Special Olympics tries to remove “r-word,” Chelsea Clinton to marry, and Kendra Wilkinson is putting out her own line of stripper poles.

8 a.m.

Mat asked for ideas for a theme for the 91X team for the Carlsbad 5000.

He wanted to be the Might Morphin’ Flower Rangers.

He also thought he should dress as Octomom and everyone else could be all his babies. Someone called in and suggested it, too! Brainwaves.

Other ideas: Smells Like Team Spirit, Bruce Jenner and the Kardashians, Luchadores masks and Speedos and a Bunk Bed, Classic SNL Characters, Snow White and the 7 “R-words,” and Weedies.

Join in the fun! Join in the run! What else can I rhyme!?

 9 a.m.

Mario’s wife called in to tell him what a great job he’s doing.

Sammi and Mat argued about how cute/vicious sea turtles may or may not be.

 SPECIAL GUEST!

Scott from Stay Classy returned for a Yelp-like segment to get people involved with important causes.

Get Your Karma On?

Tomorrow: Wine Into Water @ Airport Lounge

The more wine you drink, the more water you provide for those in need!

Saturday: HUGE Pre-Party @ High Dive

All Elemental Experience tickets purchased at the High Dive will be upgraded to VIP tickets!

April 11: PB Scavenger Hunt & Pre-Party starting and ending @ PB Bar & Grill

Find Secret Pizza!

And don’t forget to get your tickets to Elemental Experience!

Mario did his American Idol Recap LIVE! (As his family continued to call in and say they’re listening.)

Carlos thanked Chrissy Russo for some reason.

Preston thanked Carlos for some reason.

Mario thanked everyone.

Sammi thanked Adderall and Mexican Pastries.

Hollaback, marijuana.

-SS

 

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5:30 a.m.

Mat said Sammi smelled like a distillery. She only got an hour of sleep.

Mat predicted either Sammi would be hilarious today, or you wouldn’t hear a peep out of her.

Mat only got four hours of rest. Asleep, burrito in belly, he dreamt the greatest song in the world.

Unfortunately he forgot everything except the lyric, “This is our band.”

Mat saw Sam the Cooking Guy out and about last night dressed head to toe in Fubu with frosted tips and Oakley’s.

He was jealous of all the attention Sam was getting, and pouted when Sam failed to notice that they were standing right next to one another for 45 minutes before Sam the Cooking God said hello.

We love him.

Sammi mumbled about Drumline and manatees before announcing she has to go to the DMV today.

 6 a.m.

SPECIAL GUEST!

Bo Burnham, the 18-year-old comical musician or musical comedian, called in to talk about his special on Comedy Central tomorrow night.

Mat asked if the offensive nature of his humor is acceptable due to his delivery or to his boyish good looks.

He attributed it to his boyish good looks because then people can just say, “Oh, he’s a kid, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

Mat asked what it was like to be one of the most subscribed to people on YouTube.

Burnham replied existentially, “What does subscribed even mean?”

He dismissed the honor as somewhat meaningless as all his subscribers aren’t necessarily people. They could be cyborgs or just one guy with a bunch of accounts.

Burnham said it’s easy to become a YouTube sensation. It just takes a lot of luck and a complete lack of dignity.

Watch his Comedy Central special tomorrow at 11 p.m. if you like word play and a dude who’s just “a little bit goofy.”

And keep an eye out for the musical he is writing with Judd Apatow.

Mat played one of his songs for everyone called “Love Is.”

What’s on the Internet?

Post a question for President Obama here.

and

http://100waystokillapeep.blogspot.com/

7 a.m.

 ANOTHER SPECIAL GUEST!

Jim Gaffigan called in to talk about his upcoming Comedy Central Special and, of course, Hot Pockets.

Gaffigan promised it will be as controversial as ever as he tackles hard-hitting issues and taboo topics like bacon, ketchup, and bowling.

He said he’s so offensive that half the crowd typically walks out of the room as soon as he enters.

Mat told him that he needs to always rock a beard to which he replied, “Girl, I hear you.”

His brief history lesson taught us that Vikings went to Ireland and partied it up, leaving him with pale skin and blondish red hair.

Sammi asked him about a MySpace message she received from him when she first created an account way back in high school.

He personally wrote a note and sent her a friend request because she had “manatees” listed under her Interests. At the time he said he was simply seeking out anyone who shared his Interest in manatees.

Gaffigan says that technology is moving way too rapidly for him. For example, he only uses his Twitter to tell people that he loves diarrhea.

Check out his special “King Baby” Sunday at 9 p.m. on Comedy Central!

Pop Trash: The Shins tour, ‘Where the Wild Things Are’ trailer (!!!!!!!), Sean Penn and Nat Portman, Three Stooges movie, and a man calls 911 after his estranged wife handcuffs herself to him.

8 a.m.

BEER FOR BREAKFAST

Finally, a boisterous crew in to enjoy some brew!

Mark, Brandon and Nate from Oceanside Ale Works came in to share their beer and laughs with us.

The brewer, GM, and lead brewer, respectively, presented Mat with a 91X tap handle made of wood from the original Oceanside pier.

It was to make up for Brandon’s P1 Army tattoo.

Two of the brewers are school teachers. Brandon is one of Mark’s ex-students.

The guys got into the brewing biz almost accidentally.

“It was a hobby that spun way out of control.”

They said life’s easy when you’re doing what you love and get to drink on the job. (Sounds familiar.)

The gang reviewed Oceanside Ale Works’ American Strong Ale. The 9.2% beer was originally a mistake.

Mark said if we drank it right when its done fermenting without letting it age, it would taste like jet fuel.

But we didn’t, so it didn’t.

They planned on making it a seasonal ale, but locals began sitting at the door shaking their pint glasses chanting, “I need the strong ale!”

Carlos compared it to the pot o’ gold at the end of a drunken rainbow.

Mat compared it to a tranny… and it made sense.

She’s smooth and sultry and then BAM! There’s an Adam’s apple.

Sammi said it tasted like the California Dream. It had the savory flavor of everything she imagined about and moved out here for.

Find Oceanside Ale Works all around the tri-city area from Four Seasons to P’s and Q’s.

Keep an eye out for their upcoming Cactus Cream Ale!

And visit the tasting hours on Fridays and Saturdays for $4.

Email beer@91x.com if you want to come in!

And gear up for our Home Brew Challenge.

ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 13TH GRADER?

Carlos is pretty, but is he smart?

Carlos, the 91X Morning Show’s resident 13th grader, and Javier, a Mexican Cal grad who wanted to take on the Colombian Dark Lord in a battle of the Latin races, went head to head in a battle of knowledge.

Mat’s wife put the game together for today so it was super-hard because she’s super-smart.

The questions:

Name the primary colors.
What’s the denominator in 1/5?
What’s the formula to find the area of a circle?
In Greek (not Roman) mythology, who is the god of the Sea?
A triangle that has three unequal sides is what kind of triangle?
What year did Neil Armstrong land on the moon?
Who wrote “Catcher in the Rye?”
Name the capital of Washington.
How long did the war of 1812 last?
Who painted the Mona Lisa?

Javier went first, answering only 2 correctly.

Sammi was, again, the only one who believed that Carlos would break his losing streak today.

AND HE DID!

He was on fire.

Mat snuck Javier the tickets to Offspring and Alkaline Trio while Carlos was gloating.

9 a.m.

 YET ANOTHER SPECIAL GUEST!

Scott from Stay Classy returned for a Yelp-like segment to get people involved with important causes.

Get Your Karma On?

Today: Wild & Scenic Environmental Film Festival @ Gaslamp 15.

Free beer and wine!

March 27: Pre-party for Elemental Experience @ Stingaree.

April 2: Engineers Without Borders Wine to Water Fundraiser @ Airport Lounge.

The more wine you drink, the more water you provide for those in need!

And don’t forget to get your tickets to Elemental Experience!

More Pop Trash: Blink 182 at a recent photoshoot, and Blender mag closes.

Carlos thanked himself.

Preston thanked OAW and The Farside.

Sammi thanked Jim Gaffigan for sharing her love of manatees.

Hollaback, marijuana.

-SS

5:30 a.m.

The gang chose sides in the Chris Brown/Rihanna debacle.

To everyone’s delight, Mat read aloud from Hip Hop Weekly (the hip hop version of US Weekly).

Sammi pointed out that there were 14 exclamation marks on the cover of the magazine even though there were only five headlines. Win!

MAN DATE (Mandate) XII: Breaking World Records

The World Record Appreciation Society from URDB.org has been throwing record-breaking parties in Brooklyn for quite some time now.

The powers that be at URDB heard about the west coast chapter started by the 91X Morning Show, and is coming all the way out to break some SoCal records at a live broadcast from the House of Blues TOMORROW morning!

Mat, Mahoney, and Carlos all currently hold records as previously featured on World Record Wednesdays.

Don’t you think it’s time you accomplished something great?

What record do you want to break?

Email your ideas to morningshow@91x.com or call 570-191X and join us TOMORROW at the House of Blues for a record-breaking party and live broadcast!

91 cent beer when you buy a breakfast burrito, yo!

And live music from the Brandy Alexander.

AND PRIZES GALORE!

6 a.m.

DRUNK DIAL LINE!

Included:

Birthday song request for Sammi; robot thinks Carlos looks like an Indian woman and hearts Sammi; Randy’s at the office; hollaback, Mountain High; a poem about crack; Carlos isn’t gay, he’s gorgeous; someone super excited about Transformers 2; if you’re a boy you need to man up; and Jimmy Eat World remix about the 91X Morning Show.

What’s on the Internet? http://go-girl.com/

7 a.m.

SPECIAL GUEST!

Rob Dyrdek called in to talk about his Fantasty Factory and new show on MTV!

He sounded stoned, but doesn’t smoke. It was just the lingering effects of a recent Vegas trip.

Mat expressed his jealousy and told Dyrdek he’s headed to Reno for his big weekend.

Dyrdek was supportive, “Hey man, its a recession.”

Mat and Dyrdek discussed Dyrdek’s 21 world records as Mat told him about some of ours. (His were a bit more impressive.)

Now he hangs out in his giant warehouse that he turned into his Fantasy Factory complete with anything anyone could ever imagine.

Once he was having a little Saturday afternoon get together and the cops showed.

All of a sudden there were a bunch of blue uniforms flying across the warehouse on the zip line.

He thinks his own show is insane, which always makes for good TV.

Often during filming he thought, “What am I doing? I’m going to kill this guy!”

He keeps a gang of naysayers around just so he can disappoint them when he goes through with all his crazy ideas.

His assistant wants to be on TV so bad, so he blurs his face on every episode. Just to crush his dreams repeatedly. Awesome.

What can you expect from Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasty Factory?

One episode features him and Drama being intentially attacked by sharks. They yell at the sharks. They even have an underwater argument.

Dyrdek said there’s no more bizarre a feeling than waiting for a shark to attack you.

He also bought the tennis ball cannon from the original American Gladiators. And made it mobile.

Oh, and he has a gangsta rapping receptionist.

Rob Dyrdek’s Fantasy Factory: Sunday nights at 9 on MTV. Watch it.

Pop Trash: Man Date 12, Tracy Morgan’s fish tank on fire, Tony Rock gets a DUI, Futurama back, NPH to play the Flash, K Fed and Bone Thugs, and Adam Carolla fired from CBS.

8 a.m.

BEER FOR BREAKFAST

Today the guys and girl reviewed Dixie Blackened Voodoo Lager from New Orleans in honor of Mardi gras.

No wait… it says on the bottle its from Wisconsin, as Carlos pointed out.

Nasty Nate explained that it used to be in New Orleans, but had to be relocated after Katrina.

Voodoo is 5 percent alcohol by volume.

It was purchased at the Mission Valley BevMo for $9.99 a 6 pack. Mahoney spent a whopping $22.68 on beer yesterday. It was not on sale.

Voodoo is best served out of a flute or pilsner glass.

The color: a strong mahogany with light crimson hues.

Mat took a sip and was instantly transformed from Catholic to Wiccan.

Preston compared it to Galic literature. It was Beowulf in a bottle.

Sammi said it smelled like goth kids.

Mat agreed and took a giant whiff of what seemed to be the inside of vinyl pants with belts and zippers.

Carlos said it tasted like bong water.

It was not as pleasant as Mahoney hoped, because it was almost watered down.

Sammi compared the brew to the movie “The Craft,” and would pair it with an Ann Rice novel.

Mahoney rated it a meager 2.7 of 5 on Mahoney’s Beer Scale of Supremacy.

The Stay Classy guys returned as promised to announce the lineup of their Elemental Experience festival in Mission Bay Park May 2.

Oh,and they brought beer. Rad.

To reiterate : all proceeds are going to the Stay Classy Foundation’s efforts to build a San Diego shelter for homeless youth.

THE LINEUP:

Jay Nash!

Pete and Jay!

Dirty Sweet!

Bassnectar!

Mason Jennings!

Pinback!

Matisyahu!

Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Sorry about all the !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’s. I’ve been reading Hip Hop Weekly.)

9 a.m.

ANOTHER SPECIAL GUEST!

Matt Kenseth, 2009 Daytona 500 winner, called in to talk about his big win and his participation in the Auto Club 500 in Fontana this weekend.

He won the Daytona 500 after starting 39th… in his back up car.

He was surprised by the NASCAR fan base in San Fran.

That’s pretty much all I got from that interview as Mat had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

Then Mat made him feel uncomfortable about liking Three Doors Down.

More Pop Trash: Lily Allen BFFs with LiLo, and Madonna wants to be in New Moon.

WHAT DID YOU LEARN TODAY?

Lessons learned: Beer can taste like an epic poem, 50 Cent and Rick Ross have a beef worthy of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, and Tracy Morgan is an idiot when it comes to fish.

Carlos thanked Mahoney for blurring out his face tomorrow.

Preston thanked Hustler for providing Chrissy Russo with her wardrobe.

Sammi thanked Rob Dyrdek’s blurry-faced friend.

Mahoney thanked Sammi for stealing his “thanks.”

Hollaback, marijuana.

-SS

 

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5:30 a.m.

Mat went to the House of Blues last night for the Scott Russo benefit show. There, and back, he played Gas Tank Rodeo. He even went against his better judgement and swung by La Posta for a Carne Asada burrito. And then sputtered into work this morning.

While Mat went on about his “glorious victory,” Sammi scoffed.

Not only does he have a meter to tell him how many miles he has left in his tank, but people play and win Gas Tank Rodeo everyday without bragging incessantly about it.

Today is even the two-week anniversary of Sammi’s first round of Engine Check Light Rodeo. She does not have a rearview or right side mirror. Nor does she have a cap for her gas tank.

So, again, she scoffed. He’s still in the minor leagues.

The 91X Morning Show received the best email ever:

Subject: Hello, I’m Preston’s Wet Dream

“I’m kidding.  I know Preston doesn’t dream.  He doesn’t like to hold long thoughts, avoids complicated ideas and things that require more than 5 seconds of serious attention. .  He has about the memory span of a goldfish hatched in bong water living in a rinsed out Coolwhip container on Mahoney’s coffee table.  (Does Mahoney even have a coffee table?)  He also smells like roadkill and doesn’t put out.  People throw things at him in public.  His friends video tape him as people throw things at him in public and then post the video on the internet.  A degree in anthropology.  … just what every little girl dreams of for a future boyfriend– as proved by the dredges of drunk-dialers leaving messages moaning themselves to sleep over what they think may be the only exceptionally well-muscled male specimen to exist in radio.  Some of those girls have even met him.  Yet Sammi, who sees him everyday won’t touch him with a ten foot pole.  I should probably take the sisterly hint.

 

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530am

Married Mat went out to dinner with his super hot wife, probably at some I’m-a-hipster-look-at-me place when his waiter asked mat if he was in town for comic-con. Mat being a self conscious elitist, he freaked out (on the inside). We all know Mat doesn’t like confrontation so he genuinely answered no. (OOOOHHH you just got Diablo’d!!!!)

Sammi is out of town (who cares where) and decided to call in, the first word out of her mouth was the f-bomb, classy.

Mat called Mahoney out for looking the way he did at our Stay-Classy Tailgate/ FloBots Concert on Saturday. Contrary to what “everyone” thinks, Mahoney is on his way up with the ladies…according to him. After dumping his last girl, the ladies have been lining up to date him…according to him.

6am

News and Sports

Mahoney decided to “Sham” Carlos and posted up a drunken passed out picture of him from Saturday night. Preston of LoudSpeakerSD was also there and proceeded to take pictures with his hairy ass on and around Carlos’ face. Mahoney being his immature self thought it would be funny to post the pics online for the world to see.

What’s on the internet:

www.crazyforts.com

We’re bringing it back!!! Remember when you built forts using your moms couch cushions, chairs and bed sheets…well this is the ‘Summer of Forts’.

-Drunk Dial-

Fatty made another appearance, a girl called in about her drama between her and her GF and some guy too stoned to say anything else, simply said one word, Marijuana.

7am

News and sports.

Our listener Chris called in to update us on his mom who was thrown in jail for a DUI last week. He informed us that his mom’s boss bailed her out for $15,000. Poor guy.

Sweat, a fit club in Hillcrest (nuf said), was another gem of audio. The flamboyant yet realllllly angry store owner told news reporters how he really felt.

-Pop Trash-

8am

News and sports.

Carlos needs money, nothing new. What is new is how he’s going about making money… no, not selling drugs; he wants to NASCAR-out his ride. He wants his car wrapped in ads. He’s willing to have the hood of his car, the 1/4 panels, as well as the whole side of his car wrapped in ads, all to Mats discretion. After all Mat is the one paying Carlos to drive around with the ads.

More stuff happened…

(Carlos wrote this.)